Summer is approaching.
The sun is finally out, the strawberries are appearing at the markets, and the taste of happiness fills the air. Sometimes I catch a glimpse of it before the darkness swallows me up again.
Over the past week or so a few things have happened that may hinder or help my stress levels. I’ve had some pressure taken off at work, hopefully more to come, and I’ve also moved back into my parents house. I’m not sure if these two things combine will provide a better or worse environment to help me get back on the road to happiness, but summer is going to play its part and help give me back the spring in my step.
The mere flicker of sunlight makes me reflect, relax, and connect with the nature around me. I could sit on the grass watching the world go by for hours on end if the sun is beaming down on me. Considering endless possibilities about my life, endless choices and endless problems, wondering how to find the solutions.
When I spoke to my Dr he advised blood tests to check my vitamins and minerals, and then anti depressants to help combat my mood. Something inside is telling me to take the drugs. To give in to them, to let them help me from the inside out. If I don’t I forsee a summer or cider and pringles, which will both just depress me further.
Summer brings with it the endless bounty of food available. Fresh vegetables on the market, fresh fruits lining the stalls, ripe and ready to devour their sweet, juicy, flesh. Summer is a time when it’s easy to eat healthy.
I’ve been trying to eat better. I really have. But the boredom gets to me. The stress gets to me. The anxiety gets to me. Food helps it ALL. Food makes everything better.
Everything except me.